ON THE BUSES

I read an article in Dog World the other week, written by someone who presumably visits dog shows in her Porsche, about the "quaint old days" when people travelled to shows by train and coach.

Well, I have news for her. People still do. And I thought It was about time to set the record straight.

So lets hear it for the bus folk! The people who wait in deserted hotel car parks in the small hours to pack themselves all their show gear, and their dogs into a coach and trundle off south down the M6, trying to sleep on the hardest seats in the world and making the acquaintance of the horrors of seedy motorway services, and the endless roadworks that are saved specially for weekends.

We all have our special bus memories. I can still say to bus veterans - "Remember the borzois?" and they are instantly taken back twenty years to the memories of the endless bus journey with the 3 borzios afflicted with interminable diarrhoea - I think eventually the bus had to be hosed down...

Then there were the breakdowns. I can still remember the intrepid bus organiser rushing around a motorway sevices car park trying to arrange lifts for those entered in Minor Puppy Dog, while the rest of us waited on for the relief bus.

And the drivers. Some of them kings of the road and others.....well, we recently had one who no only had great trouble staying awake, but when he pulled into a filling station was unable to get out. He manoevred back anf forth, knocking off any parts of the building rash enough to be sticking out, while the night clerk watched in horror.

You`ve seen the film. It stars Arnie or Vin Deisel, and the bus out of control ploughs inevitably into the petrol pumps and the resulting big orange explosion and FX are magnificent. I remember that night realising very clearly that the enjoyment of the said magnificent FX depended entirely on being in a cinema seat, not on the bus......

But somehow we survive it all.

And - know what? We`re going to do it again!